Ha-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! The duff-duffs keep getting better and better, and they don't get any better than tonight's.
Sur-P-R-I-I-I-I-SE! Just as Dot comes wittering through the door. Charlie's face was a picture.
This episode got an 8 for me, purely down to John Altman, who barely had a word to say, but whose every line was a winner, and who camped it up as Nick, skulking about, in black, with his hood up, peeping through branches and around corners, breaking into Ronnie's home, lifting money (and a picture of the latest baby scan), and uttering classically Nick lines.
To Donna:-
Oi! What happened to Snow White and the other Seven?
To Charlie:-
'Ello, son!
Well, well, well ... Ronnie's father-in-law, whoda thunk it? I'm hoping the baby's name is Damien, because he's certainly got the pedigree of a psychopath.
This was very much a filler episode, with an emphasis on a lot that was obviously trite EastEnders, but John Altman took it to another level.
Bravo, Nick! Welcome back!
And now, for something completely different (but really the same and what was expected):-
Stacey and Dean. I'm loving Stacey this time around, but it's nice to know that TPTB have remembered her very basic and unchangeable characteristic of jumping into the fire, both feet first, without any thought of subsequent consequences, either to herself or to others. Last week, she was shouting the odds about how what Alfie was doing was wrong - in other words, the return of Stacey the Moral Arbitre. Of course, Alfie did wrong, but Stacey was thinking within the parameters of the moral box, and not thinking that sometimes morality means cutting off your nose despite your face.
Now, she's entered into a physical relationship with Dean, and she gives it the old Stacey try. Their sleeping together was a mistake, it was wrong, she gives him the cold shoulder all morning at the salon, and exercises her moral arbitre powers, once again - this time, to give Lola her job back, since Lola's taken offi without any notice, on an obvious lie, and wants to waltz right back into what she was doing before.
Dean is a businessman. His answer is no. And why not? He needs people who are dependable, not people who whisk away at the drop of a hat. But then Stacey reminds him that Lola is a single mum. And that's before she reminds him that their night of passion meant little more to her than a need for companionship for the evening. In fact, she tells him that she used him.
(Big mistake, Stace. Don't ever show Dean rejection).
Then, something unusual happens. Stacey has this interaction with Tosh, who's found out that she isn't pregnant and who has a heart-to-heart with Stacey, Dean finds this out, via Stacey, and admits that he's relieved because he would have been the father. Then suddenly, he and Stacey are on a good footing again. This is leading down the primrose path of Stacey and Dean beginning a real relationship. Putting aside what Dean's done and the fact that his particularly callous crime means a short shelf life, in another place and time, I'd have welcomed a Dean-Stacey relationship, and for a few moments of forgetting what he's done, you can see the chemistry there, which is going to make the reveal to Stacey all the more horrific and, at the same time, poignant.
The Mitchell Same Old Same Old. This was pure kitsch, when EastEnders isn't supposed to be kitsch. Ronnie calls a family meeting to announce her engagement to Charlie, whom Phil and everyone else thinks is a policeman. The storyline is filled with EastEnders' greatest clichés - the telephone call where everyone's mobile rings at once, the ubiquitous Mitchell meeting with Ronnie on the defensive. How many of these "Mitchell meetings" were called in the days when Ronnie was on-again-off-again with Jack? How many times did Phil get shirty about Jack being involved with Ronnie? How many times did Ronnie move out of the Vic in a hump?
Substitute Charlie for Jack.
Phil's reaction was downright comical, as was his summoning all the rest of the Mitchells to leave the house with him, and they followed like sheep.
I don't want filth in this family!
Well, you won't be getting filth in your family, Phil. Charlie's a bog-cleaner!
Phil's toast was pretty accurate, however. This marriage will be one big mess; it's written in the stars. Make no mistake. Charlie and Ronnie are not Romeo and Juliet. They're two psychopaths about to come into conflict with the King of the Psychopaths. Charlie is just another one of Ronnie's blokes who will be left picking up whatever pieces remain or who'll be vapourised, himself, in the conflict that's about to evolve.
What was more disconcerting, however, was the scene between Ronnie and Roxy. Ronnie asked that Roxy be at the Mitchell Lunch, and Roxy told her she'd promised to have lunch with Amy and her friend. Ronnie insisted - nay, Ronnie demanded. Roxy actually protested that Amy was her daughter and that she'd promised a lunch with her - Ronnie then insisted that her engagement announcement was more important.
Really, Ronnie?
Roxy isn't the best mother at anytime, and yet you are putting yourself and your latest engagement as more important than Roxy spending time with her daughter. (Well, actually, she wasn't, but still you get the idea of where Ronnie's priorities are - about herself).
The Mitchell sisters have regressed in many ways to the point where they were in 2007, and I don't think this is a good thing. They are, respectfully, 40 and 36. They've both been married once before and have been around the block too many times to count. Still, there they are, acting like the twenty year-olds they wish they were, squealing over a tiny diamond ring once given to Dot by Charlie Cotton I, and Roxy's problem is that she's jealous becaue Ronnie's got "Mr Perfect" and Roxy's got a man who argues about unpacking shopping and who picks his toenails in bed.
Roxy whines about having to unpack shopping, because Aleks has to go back to work. Aleks isn't perfect, Roxy, because he's using you as a bit on the side, whilst he keeps his wife and child happy as well. You are a patsy, and your sister is a psychopath.
Teenage Angst. Please. Enough is enough. Abi is sulking and feeling sorry for herself and doing what most Branning girls do - sit on their arses all day long, expecting to be subsidised by their father and never ceasing to remind him that they are adults, thank you very much, and can do as they like, as long as he keeps forking them money.
Abi still acts like a spoiled little girl, giving the evil eye to Jay and Lola in the pub. Lola clearly doesn't know what's happened between Jay and Abi or that Abi is blaming her for the split. Having said that, I like NuNuBen, and I think silly Abi does as well, misinterpreting his friendly concern as something more than it is. Ben's got eyes for Johnny. Abi's going to be dumped again.
Oh Carol. Speaking of dumped, that would be Sonia. What an awful, awful person! She wonders why Rebecca's avoiding her - even Martin's told Kush that Rebecca's been giving Sonia a hard time, and there was more trash-talking of Martin tonight. I'm not surprised Sonia's daughter and her husband are giving her a wide berth. She's an unpleasant, self-righteous, miserable, selfish cow of a woman, who tries to present herself as if she's the victim here - nothing new. She's snogged Tina, who encouraged her attentions; and now when she leans in for a snog with Kush - again, another one who misinterprets friendship as something more - he hastily moves out of her sphere. Top man.
On the other hand, Carol's recovered from her double mastectomy very quickly. Quickly enough to have even sprouted boobs again. A double mastectomy is a major, major operation, and you're on the mend for months. Her scars would still be sore, and she'd still be under an extensive programme of physiotherapy in order to develop muscles in her chest and underarms in order to allow her to lift things ... like kettles in cafes? She had the operation at the end of August and here it is barely November. She wouldn't be back in the swing of things (pun intended) before the beginning of the year.
Pam's right, however. This is time for Carol to concentrate on herself, and put her family on hold for the moment, but now Rebecca has moved away from the odious Sonia, at the age of thirteen, which is what underage kids on EastEnders can do.
This is the advent of Martin, I hope.
This episode was totally saved by Nick.
Sur-P-R-I-I-I-I-SE! Just as Dot comes wittering through the door. Charlie's face was a picture.
This episode got an 8 for me, purely down to John Altman, who barely had a word to say, but whose every line was a winner, and who camped it up as Nick, skulking about, in black, with his hood up, peeping through branches and around corners, breaking into Ronnie's home, lifting money (and a picture of the latest baby scan), and uttering classically Nick lines.
To Donna:-
Oi! What happened to Snow White and the other Seven?
To Charlie:-
'Ello, son!
Well, well, well ... Ronnie's father-in-law, whoda thunk it? I'm hoping the baby's name is Damien, because he's certainly got the pedigree of a psychopath.
This was very much a filler episode, with an emphasis on a lot that was obviously trite EastEnders, but John Altman took it to another level.
Bravo, Nick! Welcome back!
And now, for something completely different (but really the same and what was expected):-
Stacey and Dean. I'm loving Stacey this time around, but it's nice to know that TPTB have remembered her very basic and unchangeable characteristic of jumping into the fire, both feet first, without any thought of subsequent consequences, either to herself or to others. Last week, she was shouting the odds about how what Alfie was doing was wrong - in other words, the return of Stacey the Moral Arbitre. Of course, Alfie did wrong, but Stacey was thinking within the parameters of the moral box, and not thinking that sometimes morality means cutting off your nose despite your face.
Now, she's entered into a physical relationship with Dean, and she gives it the old Stacey try. Their sleeping together was a mistake, it was wrong, she gives him the cold shoulder all morning at the salon, and exercises her moral arbitre powers, once again - this time, to give Lola her job back, since Lola's taken offi without any notice, on an obvious lie, and wants to waltz right back into what she was doing before.
Dean is a businessman. His answer is no. And why not? He needs people who are dependable, not people who whisk away at the drop of a hat. But then Stacey reminds him that Lola is a single mum. And that's before she reminds him that their night of passion meant little more to her than a need for companionship for the evening. In fact, she tells him that she used him.
(Big mistake, Stace. Don't ever show Dean rejection).
Then, something unusual happens. Stacey has this interaction with Tosh, who's found out that she isn't pregnant and who has a heart-to-heart with Stacey, Dean finds this out, via Stacey, and admits that he's relieved because he would have been the father. Then suddenly, he and Stacey are on a good footing again. This is leading down the primrose path of Stacey and Dean beginning a real relationship. Putting aside what Dean's done and the fact that his particularly callous crime means a short shelf life, in another place and time, I'd have welcomed a Dean-Stacey relationship, and for a few moments of forgetting what he's done, you can see the chemistry there, which is going to make the reveal to Stacey all the more horrific and, at the same time, poignant.
The Mitchell Same Old Same Old. This was pure kitsch, when EastEnders isn't supposed to be kitsch. Ronnie calls a family meeting to announce her engagement to Charlie, whom Phil and everyone else thinks is a policeman. The storyline is filled with EastEnders' greatest clichés - the telephone call where everyone's mobile rings at once, the ubiquitous Mitchell meeting with Ronnie on the defensive. How many of these "Mitchell meetings" were called in the days when Ronnie was on-again-off-again with Jack? How many times did Phil get shirty about Jack being involved with Ronnie? How many times did Ronnie move out of the Vic in a hump?
Substitute Charlie for Jack.
Phil's reaction was downright comical, as was his summoning all the rest of the Mitchells to leave the house with him, and they followed like sheep.
I don't want filth in this family!
Well, you won't be getting filth in your family, Phil. Charlie's a bog-cleaner!
Phil's toast was pretty accurate, however. This marriage will be one big mess; it's written in the stars. Make no mistake. Charlie and Ronnie are not Romeo and Juliet. They're two psychopaths about to come into conflict with the King of the Psychopaths. Charlie is just another one of Ronnie's blokes who will be left picking up whatever pieces remain or who'll be vapourised, himself, in the conflict that's about to evolve.
What was more disconcerting, however, was the scene between Ronnie and Roxy. Ronnie asked that Roxy be at the Mitchell Lunch, and Roxy told her she'd promised to have lunch with Amy and her friend. Ronnie insisted - nay, Ronnie demanded. Roxy actually protested that Amy was her daughter and that she'd promised a lunch with her - Ronnie then insisted that her engagement announcement was more important.
Really, Ronnie?
Roxy isn't the best mother at anytime, and yet you are putting yourself and your latest engagement as more important than Roxy spending time with her daughter. (Well, actually, she wasn't, but still you get the idea of where Ronnie's priorities are - about herself).
The Mitchell sisters have regressed in many ways to the point where they were in 2007, and I don't think this is a good thing. They are, respectfully, 40 and 36. They've both been married once before and have been around the block too many times to count. Still, there they are, acting like the twenty year-olds they wish they were, squealing over a tiny diamond ring once given to Dot by Charlie Cotton I, and Roxy's problem is that she's jealous becaue Ronnie's got "Mr Perfect" and Roxy's got a man who argues about unpacking shopping and who picks his toenails in bed.
Roxy whines about having to unpack shopping, because Aleks has to go back to work. Aleks isn't perfect, Roxy, because he's using you as a bit on the side, whilst he keeps his wife and child happy as well. You are a patsy, and your sister is a psychopath.
Teenage Angst. Please. Enough is enough. Abi is sulking and feeling sorry for herself and doing what most Branning girls do - sit on their arses all day long, expecting to be subsidised by their father and never ceasing to remind him that they are adults, thank you very much, and can do as they like, as long as he keeps forking them money.
Abi still acts like a spoiled little girl, giving the evil eye to Jay and Lola in the pub. Lola clearly doesn't know what's happened between Jay and Abi or that Abi is blaming her for the split. Having said that, I like NuNuBen, and I think silly Abi does as well, misinterpreting his friendly concern as something more than it is. Ben's got eyes for Johnny. Abi's going to be dumped again.
Oh Carol. Speaking of dumped, that would be Sonia. What an awful, awful person! She wonders why Rebecca's avoiding her - even Martin's told Kush that Rebecca's been giving Sonia a hard time, and there was more trash-talking of Martin tonight. I'm not surprised Sonia's daughter and her husband are giving her a wide berth. She's an unpleasant, self-righteous, miserable, selfish cow of a woman, who tries to present herself as if she's the victim here - nothing new. She's snogged Tina, who encouraged her attentions; and now when she leans in for a snog with Kush - again, another one who misinterprets friendship as something more - he hastily moves out of her sphere. Top man.
On the other hand, Carol's recovered from her double mastectomy very quickly. Quickly enough to have even sprouted boobs again. A double mastectomy is a major, major operation, and you're on the mend for months. Her scars would still be sore, and she'd still be under an extensive programme of physiotherapy in order to develop muscles in her chest and underarms in order to allow her to lift things ... like kettles in cafes? She had the operation at the end of August and here it is barely November. She wouldn't be back in the swing of things (pun intended) before the beginning of the year.
Pam's right, however. This is time for Carol to concentrate on herself, and put her family on hold for the moment, but now Rebecca has moved away from the odious Sonia, at the age of thirteen, which is what underage kids on EastEnders can do.
This is the advent of Martin, I hope.
This episode was totally saved by Nick.
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